Several weeks ago, while grooming my baby locks it occurred to me how much more in command of my personal space I felt. I
wondered if there was a connection between my decision to allow the strands of my hair to reconnect and the stronger connection
I felt to life and the rhythms of the earth. Had they opened a pathway to vibrations in the universe that I was previously
While I was musing and twisting locks at the same time, their willful arrangement reminded me of dancing children which led
me in that rambling free association way to thoughts of my own children. Hmmm, I thought to myself, if my locks are picking
up vibrations, serving as my antennae if you will, is it possible that my children -- literally "the flesh of my flesh"--
also serve as my antennae?
Within days after posing this question to myself, I was re-reading a passage from Deepak Chopras How to Know God. In
his book, Chopra describes some elementary quantum theory. From as much as I can understand, at the very basic level we are
all composed of the smallest particles called atoms. Atoms are composed of nothing or more accurately nothing material. There
is no substance or physicality to them, they are simply vibrating packets of energy called "quantum" . Stay with me now, this
is all leading somewhere.
Neal Walsch in his book Conversation with God uses the analogy of a rock. If we consider a rock, to the unassisted
eye it appears that it is solid mass. But on closer inspection, one discovers that it is composed of the same vibrating pockets
of energy alluded to by Chopra. These packets of energy (quantum) are constantly in motion, winking in and out of existence
faster than the human eye can perceive. The energy packets of the rock are in perfect syncopation allowing the atoms to hold
the image of "we are rock" and transmit that energy information to the perceiver of the rock. On a certain level, the perceived
and the perceiver become one, "the judging subject is always inseparable from the field of rationally observed phenomena".
[see Ludwig Boltzmann(1897), Albert Einstein Theories of Time].
Reflecting on this information fueled my imagination, and I went from musing to proclaiming, yes my children are also my antennae.
After all, like my locks, they were nourished and sustained by my body. Our atoms shared the same physical space for nine
months. Such a prolonged period of intimacy obviously necessitates syncopation of rhythms a sharing of energy forces. It appeared
logical (and I was delighted to discover that Einstein concurs) that even upon physical separation, on a subatomic level my
vibrations continue to reverberate through them and theirs through me. Perhaps to the casual observer, the perceiver, we still
all announce ourselves as "rock" one entity, indistinct from one another.
My children, my antennae. Like the curling tendrils of my locks, tentacles extending out into the world, transmitting on dual
wavelengths vibrations, energy, information. Perhaps this sharing of vibrations could explain why sometimes when I am silently
pondering a question, out of the blue one of them will shout out the answer. Why my guts tighten when they are in trouble
even though they might be miles away. Or more importantly, maybe its the reason why whenever one of them "acts out", I can
always trace their behavior back to some misbehavin' on my own part.
My children physically manifest back to me my own inner turmoil or joy. In particular, their energies are quite adept at alerting
me to when I am not on top of my game, off center, untethered from my foundation. I have to "check myself" whenever I find
myself responding on a visceral or emotional level to something that one of them has said or done. When I have to bite my
tongue to prevent, "you all are dancing on my last good nerve" from slipping through my lips, I turn inward and question my
own transgressions. Whose good nerves have I been two-steppin' on?
Communing on this level of vibrations with my children is a gift. For me it lends yet another layer to my already sacred role
as avatar "one who teaches". Just as I chose to come through my mother with the knowledge that she would serve as avatar to
me, my children chose me out of all the billions of people on this earth to serve in this same role for them.
While honored and profoundly grateful, I am challenged to remain true to the responsibility that comes along with this gift.
If I allow myself to slip even for a short period, into negative patterns of behavior, I find that I interrupt the flow of
energy, break the connection. I have learned that I must remain forever diligent and on guard. Monitor my thoughts and actions
as well as my intent. Yet, the weight of the responsibility rests on me light as a feather. For, I know that the same quantum
vibrations traveling the airwaves between me and my children, ultimately lead us all back to the One Source and I am reminded
that even on the subatomic level we are All One.